1200 lbs. of Penis

Project: My main band, "Internet Terrorists."

I noticed I put up two songs that were a bit more serious than I should start this blog off with, y'know? So yeah, here's one from our Five Moves of Doom demo, which will HOPEFULLY SOMETIME SOON get the fuck cut. 'Cuz, y'know, WE HAVE NO FUCKING JAMSPACE! It'll come though, just gotta call up these warehouses tomorrow...see if I can rent some place for us to do work.

(TWELVE HUNDRED POUNDS
OF
PENIS) x2

Every night I go out to
satisfy my lust
the people all love me
they surround me with their trust

Whipping and slapping
every upturned ass I see
give them a pearl necklace
it means nothing to me

I've used and abused
slaves from Mars to Venus
they come to expect it
I got twelve-hundred pounds of penis!

I hate to think with my dicks
That's not how I like to get my kicks
It feels so right but it looks so wrong
I don't care I just wanna get it on


(chorus)

(TWELVE HUNDRED POUNDS
OF
PENIS)x3

Bridge
(During bridge, this is spoken by the lead vocals):

I'ts not like it's one huge cock you know, it's actually seven of them. Seven huge freakin' tentacle genitals! Genticles! All of them are for you and our DAAAAAAAAARLING slaves, baby, yeah! Well all except for the seventh one, that's dirty and for potty time onliy! What, you want me to do what with my dirty potty genticle?! Ewwww, no! Pee time is meeee tiiiiiime! Oh, okay, just this once! UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNGH!)

(break back into verse)

Get a squid in a leglock
and you'll look just like me
Y'know I got Cthulu
hanging down in my pants

I work so hard to
fit in with society
only to discover
the truth will set you free

From the poor to the rich
ask anyone who's seen us
They'll tell you about how
I GOT TWELVE HUNDRED POUNDS OF PENIS!

I hate to think with my dicks
That's not how I like to get my kicks
It feels so right but it looks so wrong
I don't care I just wanna get it on

(chorus)
(TWELVE HUNDRED POUNDS
OF
PENIS)x3

Penorz!
Penii!
Penises!
Penonos!
...(skip three beats, then) PEEEENAAAAAAAUS! (whole band: PEEEENAAAAAAAUS!!!!!!0